Loneliness. A word hesitated to be spoken. A feeling that tends to be avoided by many of us. Yet something so real. Real to you. Real to me. One would question, in such a developed society as ours, why are there so many people who are lonely. What isolates them to experience a feeling as this? There are many reasons, and I am sure you can think of them.

In this post, I want to touch upon my personal view on loneliness. It is a sensitive topic, and I hope you can only try to understand where I am coming from. Firstly, I wouldn’t consider myself as physically lonely because I have family and friends. But I have experienced moments of loneliness. Why? I guess perhaps the lifestyle choice I have chosen to conform to don’t match with other’s. I’m not going to specify what but I believe isolation can be felt if you don’t ‘fit’ in with a certain lifestyle. If any one has experienced some form of isolation, then you may relate to what I am saying.

It’s difficult to talk about loneliness because it takes you to a vulnerable place one doesn’t want to be. Have you ever been caught in a whirlwind of emotions whereby a thought pierces your heart into feeling crap about yourself, it spirals, and by the end of it, loneliness defeats you. I have. It’s not nice. But not to say this happens all the time.

Who removes this feeling…?

I must. Being proactive in my thought process requires effort. Seeing a friend, talking to a friend, being surrounded by friends or family is medicine for the soul. I believe the loneliness can creep on you like a ninja out of the blue, yet the warrior in you can expose it and fight it so that serenity can be found within, eventually. Just know there are so many ways one can distract themselves from this feeling. I’m sure you know what. (I encourage one to choose healthy choices that will benefit you in the long run :)) This leads me on to express why solitude is a positive way of being in one’s own space, and why it’s good for us. I came across this article on psychologytoday.com. It out lines the benefits of seeking Solitude. Take a nice read and may you reflect on the beauty of being with your self now and again.

In today’s constantly connected world, finding solitude has become a lost art. In fact, Western culture tends to equate a desire for solitude with people who are lonely, sad, or have antisocial tendencies. But seeking solitude can actually be quite healthy. In fact, there are many physical and psychological benefits to spending time alone. 

Benefits of Seeking Solitude

1. Solitude allows you to reboot your brain and unwind. Constantly being “on” doesn’t give your brain a chance to rest and replenish itself. Being by yourself with no distractions gives you the chance to clear your mind, focus, and think more clearly. It’s an opportunity to revitalize your mind and body at the same time.

2. Solitude helps to improve concentration and increase productivity. When you remove as many distractions and interruptions as you can from your day, you are better able to concentrate, which will help you get more work done in a shorter amount of time.

3. Solitude gives you an opportunity to discover yourself and find your own voice. When you’re part of a group, you’re more likely to go along with what the group is doing or thinking, which aren’t always the actions you would take or the decisions you would make if you were on your own.

4. Solitude provides time for you to think deeply. Day-to-day responsibilities and commitments can make your to-do list seem as if it has no end. This constant motion prevents you from engaging in deep thought, which inhibits creativity and lessens productivity.

5. Solitude helps you work through problems more effectively. It’s hard to think of effective solutions to problems when you’re distracted by incoming information, regardless of whether that information is electronic or human. 

6. Solitude can enhance the quality of your relationships with others. By spending time with yourself and gaining a better understanding of who you are and what you desire in life, you’re more likely to make better choices about who you want to be around. You also may come to appreciate your relationships more after you’ve spent some time alone.

Despite knowing these benefits, it can be a challenge to find time alone in a world that seems to never sleep. Here are a few ideas to help you find more time to spend with yourself.

• Disconnect. Set aside some time each day to unplug from all the ways you connect with others. Turn off your cell phone. Turn off your Internet. Turn off your TV. If you use your computer to create, such as writing, then write without all the bells, dings, and beeps that come along with being connected to the Internet. You’ll be amazed at how much more you can get done when you’re not distracted.
• Get up or Get in Early. Wake up a half hour or an hour earlier than everyone else in your house, and use that time to create, produce, problem solve, meditate, or whatever makes you happy. This strategy also works if you can get to work before everyone else arrives, and the phones begin to ring.

I hope you gained something from that.

In conclusion, I believe your attitude toward life heavily influences the way you act, your mood, and the way you can some how secure your mentality into thinking you are not the only one. You are not on your own. I also believe that if you accept your self for who you are, you are able to control your mood as well as have control over your day to some degree. Through self- acceptance, you acknowledge your wholesome character, your uniqueness thereby alleviating an air of satisfaction and all will be okay. Now go seize the day.

A buried past lingers in the air as tensions surface above

The soils embittered with tears of hurt

Two lands neighbouring one another

One calm ocean spans under blue skies shared between them

But a scarred history hangs over

Like a dark cloud that never moves

Burning resentment settles in the pits of their hearts

Dwelling on their vivid nightmare

Unforgotten as generations go by

Amid unrest among two lands

Winds breathe into the air

Life.

Trees evergreen with age, and flowers blossom beauty

As both people of their own do

No one can change the past

It is the present we live by

As we see through the eyes of today

And hope for a better tomorrow

Path to a brighter future

Hits the horizon where the sun shines

We are all human

Carrying a heart shaped like yours

Filled with blood

Of rich love overflowing into their

Hearts

Worthy to be felt between two nations

Korea and Japan.

Worthy to be free from the past.

*With a heavy history many years ago, Korea was occupied by Japan for a long time. Since then the elder generation especially hold deep resentment. Koreans known to be very emotional people, could explain why it is hard for them to let go of the past. I pray the relationship between them can become better. As far as I know now, there is tension between them now regarding trading.

Power. Wealth. Position. This can be abused in many parts of the world. It can rid people of their own happiness, as the value of what really matters in life can be trapped under the greedy hands of communism. If we take them all out of the equation, what remains? The power of relationships between family and friends as well as one’s dreams and ambitions. Ultimately, I believe the focal point of our lives is centred on love.

Sometimes, I forget to realise how fortunate I am until I read real life accounts of people who are suffering under communism. North Korean defector Yeon-Mi Park reveals the world she lived in, under the all powerful communist regime of Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong Un. In this book ‘In order to live’ , she writes openly of the dangers she and her family have faced in their escape to South Korea.

I will not reveal any spoilers as I would like you to discover for yourself her reality, that I found hard to accept, leading me to tears knowing she would do anything out of her love for her family, to escape this dreaded nightmare, many cannot wake up from till this day forward.

I found it hard to keep reading for long lengths of time because each page carried the weight of burden. As each burden was encountered, I tensed up and only wished this book was fictional. Though, the element of surprise would take me by surprise as glimmers of hope would shine through the cracks of mystery. As a new world was opening before her, so did she come to realise the fog blinding her way, the codes cracked, and a trail to freedom lay ahead of her.

I was horrified, shocked, disgusted by the ordeals she and her family went through, as my respect for them all heightened to the point where I felt we have so much to be thankful for. So little to complain about in comparison to a restricted culture as North Korea, where everything seems so normal to them given the way they had been brought up. In Yeon-Mi’s case, underneath everything, her sixth sense worked in her favour as she battled with pride and dignity to fulfil a dream that remained a pipe dream for so long. And that dream was to be free.

Gamsahamnida.

Painting of sunrise on the ocean around 5am. I used watercolour. The view was mesmerising. Pretty heavenly. They are the boat waves produced by the way hehe.. we went 1 hour 1/2 into the ocean super fast.

Everyone did so well. We were super patient and just kept fishing with a lot of faith that the ocean would open up and bring much joy to us. And it did. We all got big ones 😉 , it was fun. One time , one of us got a hammer head shark onto the boat. Never have I felt so tense in so long. It certainly hammered around! It rightfully went back into the water haha.

Altogether we all caught 12 fish 🙂 Miwa caught the long fish on the first day! Woop!! (2nd last pic) . She gave us hope for the next day 🙂