In this time we are living in, with this pandemic virus Covid-19 taking over our lives, we are subject to adapting to change. Change. Is a broad topic I have chosen to talk about. And it is very relevant to my life as it, I am sure to yours. Sometimes, change is a necessity. Sometimes, change is for the better. And sometimes change can have a negative impact on our lives. It’s crazy to think how each day, so much changes have been made. Be it our chosen outfit, the daily weather, train delays, our mood from the moment we get up to our mood the moment we return home from work, the food we choose to eat, our Netflix choice for the evening. It is among the small details in the fabric, do we recognise the colour infused into our day largely controlled by our hands, by our mindset.

Then again, there are big changes perhaps that happen beyond our control whether it be a loved one moving out, a best friend about to give birth any moment now, or someone you know is expecting a baby. All these big milestones are seem bigger than huge, sometimes I find myself overwhelmed and even though we are under the same sky, these changes make me feel like I am a bit of a statue in my own little world, taking each day as it comes. Taking each day with a big breath in and a big breath out, and the little details in the fabric are still in tact.

How do I respond to these big changes? Mixed bag of nuts comes to my mind. I feel nutty enough as it is perhaps being broody without being with anyone hahaha or just being rather emotional the fact life has to move on for many. And changes have to be adapted to whatever happens. I guess that is the nature of life. I have to accept change whether I like it or not. Even when it is most hardest to accept, behind every situation the skies will continue to be blue, the grass green and I can still walk with care upon the earth I love. Good may come out from the drastic changes made in one’s life.

Of course, where change happens, further changes will be made. Choosing to change my perspective on big changes taking place will help me to cope in the long run. I am to change my attitude and act upon creating my own changes that I feel will benefit me in the moment. One day recently, I spent a whole 8 hours in bed contemplating about many things. I do not wish this upon anyone because in all honesty I don’t think I got answers or solutions but I appreciated the stillness ( physically sort of) of my entire being. My existence. It was weirdly lethargic in a sense I could reach a meditative state whereby I was in sync with time just being time. And knowing I was still and the world was so busy put my thoughts into perspective. All my worries seemed so trivial and I wasn’t to fear anything because I have everything I need at the moment, for now. Even though I feel I’m not ticking the boxes..change will happen when it needs to happen. And I don’t think it’s fair to put pressure on ourselves to force for change because that’s like… forcing me to eat mushrooms, which I really don’t like. Our happiness will go hand in hand when changes take place for the better.

In Covid-19’s case, a bit of social distancing doesn’t harm anyone. A bit of social isolation calls for creativity. Bringing those closer together internally, as we can recognise the sentiment shared between loved ones in our video calls and words of affirmation. The collective spirit to protect one another can be largely felt through our appreciation for the NHS and humanity’s care for each other, country to country. Plus nature is healing. I pray for everyone and everything to be okay.

God bless, stay safe, big love, Miranda x

I will leave you with ‘Change’ lyrics by Lana Del Rey. I think they are really beautiful and poetically written. She is one of my favourite artists, just a fun fact of my likes.

Change

There’s something in the wind
I can feel it blowing in
It’s coming in softly
On the wings of a bomb
There’s something in the wind
I can feel it blowing in
It’s coming in hotly
And it’s coming in strong

Lately I’ve been thinking it’s just someone else’s job to care
Who am I to sympathize when no one gave a damn
I’ve been thinking it’s just someone else’s job to care
Who am I to wanna try
But

Change is a powerful thing
People are powerful beings
Trying to find the power in me to be faithful
Change is a powerful thing
I feel it coming in me
Maybe by the time Summer’s done
I will be able
To be honest, capable
Of holding you in my arms without letting you fall
When I don’t feel beautiful or stable
Maybe it’s enough to just be where we are because

Every time that we run
We don’t know what it’s from
Now we finally slow down
We feel close to it
There’s a change gonna come
I don’t know where or when
But whenever it does
We’ll be here for it

• 

Happy Mothers Day to every mother out there. My heart goes out to each and every one of you. I can’t even begin to imagine how tough it must be to raise children, however old they are right now, in a world where let’s just simply say is a bit of a crazy place to live in. As a single girl myself, I do feel the inner child in me is still there because my mother does treat me as so, under her umbrella of worry. The worry that will always be there, is here till this day. I am sure every mother can perhaps testify to this. I’d like to think my mother is a warrior and a worrier. A warrior of worries. But what makes Mother Day a special day is the fact every lil space in the corner of our minds is made to reflect upon how precious they are to us, even though it is easy to forget, as we are so immersed in our day to day lives.

A mother’s instinct can never be dismissed. I’m sure perhaps many can agree with this. To ensure the happiness of their child is in check, can be supported in their ways of expressing it, whether it be in their cooking or whether they notice you are giving off sad vibes, their ears are available when need be.

Oma

Loving me isn’t an option for her.

She just does.

She can say what she wants to say to me, however much I retaliate.

Because she can.

No matter how many times I don’t feel understood.

Somehow, in someway, she understands.

She loves putting her soul into food

For oma makes the best food ever.

she makes a cup of tea for me

because she feels like it

she is a warrior of worrying

she can’t help it.

she is a fiery woman keeping her hands warm

from giving limitlessly

to live,

love,

and laugh among

the days we live with her

admire her

for

who

she

beautifully

is.

Happy Mother’s Day Oma x

Given the hardships she has been through in her early life, Maya Angelou has shone in history as being a bold and inspirational woman with much depth in her poetry and writing. She is an American poet, singer, memoirist and civil rights activist. Here below, I have extracted information from Wikipedia outlining her career and early life. Sadly, she passed away in 2014.

‘She published seven autobiographies, three books of essays, several books of poetry, and is credited with a list of plays, movies, and television shows spanning over 50 years. She received dozens of awards and more than 50 honorary degrees.^[3] Angelou is best known for her series of seven autobiographies, which focus on her childhood and early adult experiences. The first, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings (1969), tells of her life up to the age of 17 and brought her international recognition and acclaim.

At the age of eight, while living with her mother, Angelou was sexually abused and raped by her mother’s boyfriend, a man named Freeman. She told her brother, who told the rest of their family. Freeman was found guilty but was jailed for only one day. Four days after his release, he was murdered, probably by Angelou’s uncle. Angelou became mute for almost five years, believing, as she stated, “I thought, my voice killed him; I killed that man, because I told his name. And then I thought I would never speak again, because my voice would kill anyone.” According to Marcia Ann Gillespie and her colleagues, who wrote a biography about Angelou, it was during this period of silence when Angelou developed her extraordinary memory, her love for books and literature, and her ability to listen and observe the world around her.

Shortly after Freeman’s murder, Angelou and her brother were sent back to their grandmother. Angelou credits a teacher and friend of her family, Mrs. Bertha Flowers, with helping her speak again. Flowers introduced her to authors such as Charles Dickens, William Shakespeare, Edgar Allan Poe, Douglas Johnson, and James Weldon Johnson, authors who would affect her life and career, as well as black female artists like Frances Harper, Anne Spencer, and Jessie Fauset ’ Wikipedia

Here is an amazing poem, known to be one of Angelou’s famous ones. I really love this poem because its so powerful and dynamic, I feel as though one can feel the strength behind these words. It’s almost as though you can feel the bitter struggles she’s been through but the flair of language used, shows the resilient and beautiful woman that she is. This poem is about overcoming prejudice and injustice.

Still I rise

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I’ll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
’Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.
Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I’ll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,
Weakened by my soulful cries?

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don’t you take it awful hard
’Cause I laugh like I’ve got gold mines
Diggin’ in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

‘Clean your room, Miranda!’…*sigh*

If anyone can relate with the huffing puffing sounds of your dear mother chasing you with these words repeatedly, only realising the tone of their voice slightly becomes more dramatic the longer you delay a room tidy ( I admire my mum’s persistence, I honestly do) then I am glad I’m not the only one in the receiving end just on the verge of hoping everything will tidy itself and I can stride out of the room without the care in the world about my messy nature of being so messy in every sense of the word.

But I must say there comes a point. There always comes a point where a lift of a finger goes along way to the point where a feeling of bliss will reside when one declutterfies one’s room, when your room can become a room fit for kings and queens, when tidying doesn’t necessarily need to be so burdensome but more of a practice beneficial to one’s soul and mood. Yes, as I type, I am channeling the Marie Kondo from within. Let’s Spark Joy.

So, I think my nearest and dearest would testify to the fact I’m not a tidy person. Although I aspire to be super clean all the time, it tends not to be the case. I dump and lump things together. It’s almost as though I’m so unaware of how much mess I have created, the reality tends to hit me when it reaches the point of me cursing everything in my room because I can’t seem to find what I am looking for. Deep breathes. And tidying begins.

It’s very interesting how there are people in the world (including myself) where mess doesn’t so much phase them or it doesn’t seem to bother them so much (though for me there is a line) Though, I have to say there is nothing like walking into cleanliness. Even saying the word rolls off the tongue cleanly. The feeling of being surrounded by a tidy environment can be almost let’s say…heavenly. In recent years, I have been trying to become more self sufficient in keeping my room clean. Because I’d like to think it like a friend. Treat it with kindness. As I wouldn’t want to appear messy in front of you, I don’t think I’d want to present my room to you in a messy state.

LESS IS MORE. Recently, I’ve been clearing out my room filled with pointless crap which doesn’t serve any other purpose besides sitting there filling up potentially useful space for things which I will hold onto forever. Or at least I hope to keep forever.

The whole process was exhausting. There were times when I felt as though the more things I got rid of, the more deluded I became. Because it felt as though I hadn’t gotten rid of anything at all! But after much determination and perseverance I managed to succeed in getting rid of A LOT of stuff. And it felt like a paradise I had not experienced for a while. Tidiness was in my grasp and I could sip the feeling of sweetness. I could feel as light as the room felt. This strange sensation of relief and inner peace flooded through me. I almost felt as though this challenge was worth it (not to say this is my first time tidying my room haha). I could dilute junk and draw upon my gut to tell me what brought me joy, what sparked joy. Although, I am not a naturally tidy person, I so believe the external environment reflects our internal emotions. I am sure we can all agree we feel good in tidy places. And so I will try my best to cultivate good habits in maintaining a tidy room, however hard it may seem. Thank you.

Hello everyone,

Seeing as it is the beginning of a new month March, and spring is budding in front of our eyes, I thought I’d start afresh with the first blog of the month.

For those who have encountered my blog by chance or luck or through word of mouth, a warm WELCOME to my little bubble of a blog called Miranda Meanders. I am going to give you an introduction about myself and what my blog is all about.

My name is Miranda and I absolutely love writing. I love poetry especially; reading it, writing it, reciting it. And so on here I display poetry I have written over recent years. Please take a look on the top left menu bar of this blog site. For me, poetry is an outlet for me to express my feelings and articulate the way I perceive all aspects of life. My intention is for my fellow readers to feel they can resonate with what I share, finding solace in knowing we all experience struggle, heartache, love, happiness, hope, fear, doubt, sadness. And poetically conveying these emotions is a rejuvenating experience.

I also write on different topics, mainly internal based topics. I don’t refer so much to authors or professionals as such even though I would like to involve them in future posts, but I share my thoughts based on personal experience because I feel that is when I feel my post is authentic and real. (By the way, you don’t have to agree with what I say hehe of course). But by doing this, it is a reminder to myself as well as a coping mechanism and I truly hope my little insights leave behind a warm fuzzy feeling inside you all.

And finally I like to display my art because it is something I enjoy. I’m not a pro artist or anything but I enjoy doing art and sharing it with you all. I hope you enjoy them. And there are photos as well of me here and there, dressed up for the camera hehe because don’t we all like to dress up now and again?

I have been running this blog for a year now. And I like to think 128 posts later, it seems to be going okay. It’s thanks to you all for keeping my motivation alive with your attention. I am humbled by this whole blogging experience.

I want to eventually publish my own book one day and become a writer. Currently I am taking baby steps as I invest my efforts into writing poetry and blogging so that eventually one day I can achieve my dream. I hope you enjoy Miranda meanders blog. Thank you.

God bless, big love,

Miranda x