Mirror by Sylvia Plath

I am silver and exact. I have no preconceptions.
Whatever I see I swallow immediately
Just as it is, unmisted by love or dislike.
I am not cruel, only truthful ‚
The eye of a little god, four-cornered.
Most of the time I meditate on the opposite wall.
It is pink, with speckles. I have looked at it so long
I think it is part of my heart. But it flickers.
Faces and darkness separate us over and over.

Now I am a lake. A woman bends over me,
Searching my reaches for what she really is.
Then she turns to those liars, the candles or the moon.
I see her back, and reflect it faithfully.
She rewards me with tears and an agitation of hands.
I am important to her. She comes and goes.
Each morning it is her face that replaces the darkness.
In me she has drowned a young girl, and in me an old woman
Rises toward her day after day, like a terrible fish.

A Reflection on ‘Mirror’

This poem is beautifully conveyed, shedding light upon the bittersweet tension between our inner and outer selves. How she raises the complexities surrounding a woman’s beauty, reflected in a mirror is rather captivating. I felt in such a short poem, it made me think about the nature of being a woman and how delusional I can be towards beauty. And perhaps the notion of ageing beauty. How will I feel about myself in the next 30 years?

Here is a little summary I copy and pasted from a site :

https://www.gradesaver.com/sylvia-plath-poems/study-guide/summary-mirror

‘Most of the time, the mirror looks across the empty room and meditates on the pink speckled wall across from it. It has looked at that wall for so long that it describes the wall as “part of my heart.” The image of the wall is interrupted only by people who enter to look at themselves and the darkness that comes with night.

The mirror imagines itself as a lake. A woman looks into it, trying to discern who she really is by gazing at her reflection. Sometimes, the woman prefers to look at herself in candlelight or moonlight, but these are “liars” because they mask her true appearance. Only the mirror (existing here as lake) gives her a faithful representation of herself.

Because of this honesty, the woman cries and wrings her hands. Nevertheless, she cannot refrain from visiting the mirror over and over again, every morning. Over the years, the woman has “drowned a young girl” in the mirror, and now sees in her reflection an old woman growing older by the day. This old woman rises toward her out of the mirror like “a terrible fish.”The slippery and unnerving “fish” in the poem may represent that unavoidable, darker self that cannot help but challenge the socially acceptable self.

The mirror actually dominates and interprets its world, and thus has a lot more power than it seems to suggest. It does not merely reflect what it sees, but also shapes those images for our understanding

Overall, “Mirror” is a melancholy and even bitter poem that exemplifies the tensions between inner and outer selves, as well as indicates the preternaturally feminine “problem” of aging and losing one’s beauty.’

Sylvia Plath was one of the defining voices of the twentieth century poetry. She passed away in 1963. I do love her poems, I recommend you check her poems out.

Conscience. What is our conscience? According to Google translate it is referred to as ‘a person’s moral sense of right and wrong, viewed as acting as a guide to one’s behaviour’. Sometimes, it is hard to distinguish whether the choices I make is the right choice until a feeling crawls in to the pit of my stomach and a feeling of guilt sits there, then I think it is wrong.

To have a clear conscience is a struggle, in a society where there is a big mesh of influences tossing and turning all over the place, it makes one question how can we decipher what is right and what is wrong. I guess it does help that we have laws in place, for without them, I cannot even fathom to think the madness we’d have to live through day by day. There will be disorder for sure, to the point where if we didn’t have a conscience, then how could we possibly be happy? Greed, selfishness, arrogance would be the result I imagine and violence, inequality would just take over, and perhaps no one could experience a happiness they deserve? So, this leads me to question how can we know our rights without knowing the wrongs? Maybe I’m not making sense hehe but in my mind I’d like to think I know what I am trying to say, I apologise if I made your mind boggle with confusion. You may proceed in finishing the cheeky chocolate bar to yourself haha..😉

Nonetheless, I’d like to think this all connects us to an innate sense of morale we were born with from the moment we were born. It has been moulded, nurtured over time by external influences. How we behave at school or in our jobs derives from standards and rules we follow set in stone over the generations. Our parents heavily contribute to our development, in setting their belief system in us, they mark the boundaries and draw the lines.

I read somewhere, that we know our conscience more than our parents do, more than our teachers do. It makes me think, we have so much power over our own lives, over our actions, feelings and words. The paths we choose to take in life is guided by our conscience. This in turn plays a role in our happiness. It is an inner voice within us. A feeling that directs us. A compass. I feel as though it is easy to feel guilty if you ignore a phone call or eat one too many chunky kitkats or even spend the whole day in a room or feel guilty for feeling crappy, though let’s not be too hard on ourselves!

However on the other hand , what is interesting, when I am faced in a situation that could put me in danger, I find myself listening to a 2nd self (my conscience) and consider the consequences. If I find myself double thinking and a feeling of uncertainty plays with my gut then I follow the Yoda within. I aim for the wise move. In the long run, a feeling of serene peace settles. I’d like to think the conscience as a shield you can take cover under, and you carry with you under every storm, rain or drizzle that comes your way. As simple as it sounds… sometimes you just know. You just know what to do.

To have a clear conscience is a battle but can be fought with a good will and a conscious mind. Of course I have experienced a guilty conscience, and to clear it takes courage to confide in some one you trust. It helps to clear the air, and makes the conscience feel like a pillow you can rest your mind and body on peacefully again.

I will leave you with a few thought provoking quotes I’ve come across surrounding conscience :

‘Your eye is the lamp of your body; when your eye is sound, your whole body is full of light; but when it is not sound, your body is full of darkness. Therefore be careful lest the light in you be darkness. If then your whole body is full of light, having no part dark, it will be wholly bright, as when a lamp with its rays gives you light ‘ Luke 11.34-36

‘Conscience is the inner voice that warns us that’s someone may be looking’ H.L. Mencken

‘You conscience is the measure of the honesty of your selfishness. Listen to it carefully’ Richard Bach

‘Conscience betrays guilt’ Latin proverb

This may look like I’m hiding something as i shy behind the flowers, but its just me looking mysterious ..lol

Fancy a walk in the park? Or perhaps a lengthy hike of 12 hours among the Scottish Highlands? This is what I signed myself up to, the moment I set my eyes on an advert promoting a 12 hour hike, surrounded by beauty on another level…I am so distant from. Yes please. Knowing too well, I would be in for a challenge physically, I felt it appropriate even more so to challenge myself mentally. I am not one for challenges, but when I do encounter one, I’d like to think I am willing to do whatever it takes to achieve it..i guess it does depend what it is lol..let’s save bungee jumping for another rainy day, shall we? hehehe…And above everything, the fact that this is a sponsored hike for MIND charity instantly pulled at my heart strings. I resonate with mental health as being such a significant part of our make up, our existence, the part of me I wish I could pay more attention to and yearn to promote the well being of mental health as much as I would like to all around me. In doing this hike, mirrors how I imagine my life before me is. It is a journey. It is challenging. I may experience change of winds. Or there is so much beauty around me, I can’t see it until I lift my head and look around to see what life can be for me. As I embarked on this journey, I lost a sense of time. It felt delusional as though a thief came and snatched time away only for me to be lost in the exquisite artistry and pure depth of natural colours, blending in a landscape so beautiful, I almost felt as though I was floating in some sort of dream like paradise, I’ve never entered. The landscape did its thing and just had the natural flair to display breathtaking views in such a dynamic way, I was left speechless at times. And a feeling of warmth, comfort and joy melted my cushiony heart, beating excitedly. IT IS SO BEAUTIFUL.

As we walked, I was fortunate to exchange lovely conversations with other MIND hikers and was amazed by the things they do. One lady, is part of the fundraising team in MIND and has worked for 4 years there. She says she really enjoys it. Another lady I talked to, is a child psychologist who works with children with autism, and she finds her work so rewarding. Walking and talking with people made the experience that bit richer. Among such scenery as the Scottish Highlands, it’s truly an honour to walk alongside genuinely nice people who want to help support this worthy charity. I want to stress how our physical health is equally important as our mental health. And doing this hike helped me to balance my thoughts with my actions. This being, reflective on why I am doing this hike, who am I doing it for, how this will benefit me and others, helped me to walk with purpose, which in turn left a good feeling in me the moment I crossed the finish line. Prior to this hike, I want to thank each and every person , my nearest and dearest (you all know who you are) who gave a donation or purchased a cake or a handmade card..I want to give my heart of gratitude to you all. If not for you, I would not have had such a valuable experience as this in the blessed highlands of Scotland. You are helping so many people who are struggling with mental health issues out there, who deserve as much attention and care possible. I want to say as a whole team of around 50 people for Dawn to Dusk Mind Hike 2019, we raised around £21,000 altogether. Thank you so much. And I want to encourage all to partake in these kind of charity events. It truly leaves you with a lovely feeling inside, thats irreplaceable and very memorable. God bless you all. I want to say a special thank you to my dear friend, who went on this hike with me. You kept me in good spirits. Even though we both had an encounter of a blister much needed plaster to prevent disaster moment, our company and good laffs with each other made this memory so sweet. Love you lots!

One thing I want to declare right now is how much I value taxi drivers, particularly the Stirling taxi driver who drove us from the train station to the centre. Bless his soul, he was super friendly and even offered us a yummy granola bar;we took one between us, hehe I was so touched by his kindness, I gave him a small loaf of genoa cake from sainsbury my mother packed in my bag. He talked on different things about Scotland and offered advice about our hike. He had a really thick Scottish accent, at times I would look at Louise for clarification on some words he pronounced. He left a lovely impression on us and we were super grateful to him. When we arrived we were directed to our rooms, and dinner was prepared. It was delicious as we both devoured it whole heartedly, until we reached the point of feeling so stuffed, the chocolate cake with cream seemed too ambitious to tackle… But I ate it anyway. We were then given an overview of what we were going to expect tomorrow for the hike and essential information. O and we got free hats! The atmosphere was lively. There is a group of 50 of us altogether and everyone seems super lovely and enthusiastic about everything.. So far all is good. Tomorrow we will get up at 5am, have breakfast and leave at 6.30am the latest. They emphasised it isn’t a race but more based on team work and supporting one another across 12 hours. Overall, today has been delightful. I’m excited about tomorrow, good night.